For starters, Senator, the first thing out of your mouth has to be a Perot joke. They always work, and it’ll take the edge off the fact that he’s not there–and that you were the one who made sure of it. Nothing mean: you don’t want to make the Perotistas any crankier than they already are. You could just look at your watch, glance around the room and say, ““Hey, anybody know what happened to Ross? Should we give him a few more minutes, or start now?’’ You’ll bring the whole place down, and score points for good humor.
Second (to pilfer a line from columnist Mark Shields), you’ve got to act like an underdog, not a loser. There’s a big difference. Underdogs are cheerful and optimistic. Losers are dull and sour and scream words like ““Mediscare’’ whenever they get near a microphone. I’d also think twice before attacking the president. You know he’s going to come back smiling. It’ll only feed into the worst perceptions of you (that you’re mean-spirited) and best perceptions of him (that he can take a punch). Another thing: don’t mention your war wound more than twice. Understand that your injury entitles you to the gratitude and respect of the nation. But not a vote for president.
Third, and most important, you’ve got to stop yakking about policies and start dealing in hope. Ronald Reagan was a master at it. Do like he did: weave all your ideas into a grand national theme. For example, instead of boring us to death with tax statistics here and drug statistics there, show how tax cuts will give families more money, so they can spend more time at home with their kids–the best defense against drug use. Get it? (By the way, you might want to dump the guy who came up with that lame ““Just Don’t Do It’’ slogan.)
That’s my advice. You’re free to take it. Frankly, for my side’s sake, I hope you don’t.
BY JAMES CARVILLE CARVILLE is a Democratic consultant who advises President Clinton.
My analysis: Clinton needs to take care to avoid an upset loss. The expectations for him are way too high for comfort. As long as Bob Dole doesn’t get angry or defensive, the bored media may give him the win just to keep the race interesting. To keep that from happening, Clinton has to haul out his slipperiest–and most effective–political skills.
First, he should open with a smarmy ode to Perot. ““I certainly wish Ross were here to help us sort through these important issues,’’ he could say. Sure, they’ll be retching in the press gallery, but it’ll remind viewers that Clinton was happy to debate the nutty Texan. If Dole is then forced into wasting time on the defensive about Perot, it’s a nice win for Clinton.
Next, the president should use the ““We All Agree’’ ploy. Clinton should slop it on every major issue, confusing voters trying to sort out the candidates’ differences. ““Dole wants economic growth. Me, too. Hate drugs? Me, too. Only difference is the details.’’ It is the core of his famed Republican Lite strategy. Very sneaky. Very effective. At the same time, Clinton should work hard to keep Dole on the defensive, goading him on small, touchy stuff like tobacco, family leave and the minimum wage. Clinton would love nothing more than for Dole to get angry and start snapping.
And Clinton has to avoid one subject at all costs: taxes. Republicans who run on tax cuts murder Democrats. You can look it up. In fact, Clinton’s best strategy is to stay clear of the large thorny issues altogether and stick to vague platitudes about the environment and computers in classrooms. The president needs to keep the campaign as generic as possible because his support, while wide, isn’t very deep, and he doesn’t want voters taking a hard second look. If they do, Clinton could be the one sweating in November.
BY MIKE MURPHY MURPHY is a GOP consultant who, until recently, worked for Dole.
